CODE OF THE SMARTASS
Just read the cheeky comments on this blog, and you’ll realize that those who follow me tend to be smartasses. It’s fun being a smartass, and everyone is invited to join in on all the good times. But please keep in mind that we follow a code. It’s called the Code of the Smartass:
Code of the Smartass
We’re smartasses, and proud of it. But smartasses can refer to each other by a variety of names, including: smart aleck (whatever an aleck is), smarty, smarty-pants, wise-ass, wise guy, wiseacre, wisenheimer, witling, brat, cheeky boy (or girl), malapert, rascal, saucebox, and troll. However none of these other names detract from the fact that we are all just smartasses.
Smartasses are not easily offended. But that doesn’t stop us from working hard at it.
Smartasses don’t take life too seriously. Nothing is sacred, including being a smartass.
Smartasses don’t care about convention, tradition, perdition, or any of the other shins.
Smartasses respect all religions, creeds, political beliefs, and cultures. Because without these things, there would be little left to make fun of.
Smartasses appreciate and respect wisdom. After all, wisdom is the fictile clay for creating wisecracks.
Smartasses are troublemakers, and also get into trouble a lot. We accept this as the risk one takes when acting like a smartass. We take full responsibility for the consequences of our smartassery, unless there’s a patsy nearby who we can conveniently blame.
Smartasses do not organize well. Such an organization would fall apart from internal ridicule. The only thing that keeps smartasses together is our love for smartassery.
Smartasses aren’t known for being profound or thought-provoking. But we’re commonly thought to be profane and provoking.
Even though we strive to be smartasses, sometimes we fall short and are dumbasses instead. But that doesn’t mean we can’t pick ourselves up off of our dumbasses and keep striving to be the best smartasses in the whole world.
Smartasses chase unicorns, because unicorns are unique, novel, new, different, strange, weird, and thus, interesting. And that’s all smartasses really want. Relief from boredom. Otherwise we wouldn’t be such smartasses.
Chasing Unicorns 
I’ve been trying to leave comments and WP won’t let me. I’m not ignoring you.
I should though, I really should becuse you’re a wine stealer, and you said yourself this is about being smartasses..
You can’t be both. You have to choose one or the other. Pass the black jelly beans please.
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Well this comment somehow made it through. And I’m very coordinated, so I can steal wine and be a smartass at the same time. But unfortunately, I am out of black jelly beans.
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Yeah I don’t know how. Everything looks completely different from my phone and when on my computer I couldn’t respond to anything. What the heck?!
We all know that men can’t multitask so you have to pick one and not confuse us.
Also I know that you’re hiding black jelly beans under your new lazy boy chair.
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It could be that you’re using JoRo’s phone. Her phone is very defective.
Men can multitask. For instance, I can ignore my wife and watch TV at the same time.
There are no black jelly beans under my chair. I know. I checked. All I found was some loose change.
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Oh man. We need help. I’ll take the change.
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I’ve always thought you two needed help. Here. Here’s a few coins in your hat. Be sure to spend it on food. Don’t go spending it on coffee. 💿💿
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I’ll spend it on black jelly beans of course…
I’ll ignore the first statement.
Check your email.
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Checked it. You women think we men ignore you. Not so. We always know when you’re up and walking about, so we can ask for sandwich or a glass of water.
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Now that’s the truth. So we’re not ignored if you want something.
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Right. But don’t worry, we’re always wanting something.
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Can you see a giant eye roll?!
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No, I was busy watching my wife, as she was heading near the fridge.
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You’re asking for a sandwich aren’t you?
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No, what I’d really like her to do is fix up a batch of tacos.
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Haha! I think you can handle that task all by yourself and I’ll bet that she agrees.
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If I had to handle, I’d just go down to Del Taco.
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Off with you then! And you got a new gravatar. I like it.
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Thanks. It was professionally designed.
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Love it!
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Heyyy! There is nothing wrong with my phone, smartass! And it took me over a month to find this comment, aren’t you sly!
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I don’t have to be sly. I’ll bet you were looking for the comment, with your defective phone. No wonder it took so long. Just think of all the other comments you missed, thanks to your phone.
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…mmm…!! I am sure there have been comments I missed but its not due to my phone. 😛
And I am telling myself that its not many!
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Hee-hee-hee.
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You doolally! You know what this does to my curious mind.
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Better get to searching, curious mind.
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I may be shooting lasers from my eyes at you!
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Cool. I’ll bet that looks trippy.
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LOL! 😶🤚
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