Chasing Unicorns: Chapter 7, On the Path of Unicorns, Part 1

Tap cover, to read.

This is the latest installation of a 27-part series, featuring my book, Chasing Unicorns. To read the previous installation, CLICK THIS LINK. For the next post in this series, CLICK THIS LINK. To start at the beginning, CLICK THIS LINK. To read the entire book at once, tap the book cover. Thanks for reading!

RECAP: In the last chapter, you learned how to chase unicorns. Chasing unicorns involves conventional techniques that include keeping an open mind, being on the lookout for camouflaged unicorns, and learning new things. Even more importantly, it includes being trustworthy. But this chapter will involve a technique that is far from conventional. It allows you to corral unicorns before you have to chase them.

On the Path of Unicorns, Part 1

The Path of Unicorns is a meditative path. That’s why I call it a “path.” It seems any practice involving meditation is touted as some sort of path.

People get very religious about meditation. They treat this exercise of the mind as if it was sacred, and must be regarded with an air of reverence. And so they claim that when you meditate, you are following a path. And apparently, this path leads to a holy destination, which they refer to as Enlightenment, Xanadu, Nirvana, or even, Heaven.

But don’t worry, I won’t be getting all holier-than-thou on you. Nor do I expect meditation to be sacralized, by anyone. So you won’t have to join a religion, or quit your current faith.

I’ll admit though, that meditation has a numinous quality to it, that lends toward metaphysical reflections. So if you want to get all spiritual about it, I completely understand. Go ahead and dig out your incense, mala beads, and bodhisattva statue, and have a blast!

And if you really want meditation to be sacralized, I don’t mind. In fact, I’ll help out by suggesting a religious sounding name for this path. How about Unicorniks? I think that’s a fitting name, since I’m using unicorns as symbols of unique experiences, and since the goal of this path is to increase our unique experiences.

This is fun, naming things, so now I’m going to get carried away and name something else. I’m going to call all the theories I presented in Chapters 2 through 4, Unikonics. This distinguishes theory from practice. Unikonics discusses the mechanics of our minds, with regard to how our minds produce uniqueness and happiness. But Unicorniks involves putting the theory into practice, by chasing unicorns, and by meditating.

And so we have Unikonics and Unicorniks. I’ve already presented Unikonics, in this book, up to Chapter 4, as well as much of Unicorniks, beginning with Chapter 5. But I’m not done with Unicorniks yet. Because we haven’t discussed the most important part of the practice. And that is, meditation.

Chasing unicorns, as discussed in the last chapter, can be very beneficial. But by itself, it is not meditative. It can augment the meditative practice, and thus be part of the Path of Unicorns, and I highly recommend it for that purpose. But nothing beats actual meditation for producing unique experiences and happiness. No, nothing even comes close.

That’s because meditation goes straight to the source of unicorns.

The Source

I assume that all things ultimately come from Mind. By “Mind” (with a capital “M”) I mean, any and all minds, including yours, mine, and that of all other living creatures. And this is because I’m paranoid. I’m scared to death of death. I love life and want it to go on forever. So I like to think this mind of mine, and that mind of yours, and all other minds, have been around forever, and will last forever. They are the creators and keepers of this universe.

I can’t say that I believe in eternal life, because I haven’t seen enough scientific proof to honestly assert that. But there’s no scientific proof against it, either. So I like to assume that we all live forever, while covering my ass and acknowledging that my assumption is just an assumption. To me it’s depressing to think that this Earthly life is all there is, and that after we physically die our minds are permanently annihilated.

It could be true, who knows? But damn, it’s just so frigging depressing to make that assumption. And so I prefer to assume the opposite. I assume that our minds somehow continue on, after our bodies kick the bucket. Either way is an assumption, but I like my assumption best. I could be living in a Fool’s Paradise by making this assumption, but I’d rather be a happy fool than a depressed genius.

Now, when I assume all things come from Mind, that includes unicorns. I assume our minds collectively created this universe, and thus created all the unique things found within it. Don’t ask me how to explain the physics behind this creation, because I don’t know. I never was good at Physics. Besides, it’s just an assumption. I could very well be wrong. (Notice the ass-covering here?)

But play along with me and I’ll try to make all this metaphysical maundering interesting, even if you’re a big, fat skeptic.

Consider that if all unique things come from our minds, then if we want to add uniqueness to our lives, and become happier than we currently are, we must travel the path that leads to Mind. After all, Mind is the source.

I call this, walking the Path of Unicorns. Or, Unicorniks.

When I want something, I’ve always been an advocate of going straight to the source. That’s why I was once a government employee. I needed money. The government prints money. So I went straight to the source, and applied for a government job.

Now, after 27 years of dedicated federal service, I’m retired and shower in money every day. Yep, one of my favorite pastimes is sitting in my walk-in vault, counting out 10,000 dollars, and then tossing it over my head, in a glorious green shower.

I used to do that with my gold coins, but damn, those things hurt when they clink off the top of my skull. So now I just use soft, lightweight, Ben Franklins. No more golden showers for me.

The point I’m trying to make is that going to the source of something tends to be where most of it is at. And I believe when we go straight to our minds, we can find more unicorns frolicking around than we’ll ever be able to find and catch elsewhere. Because unicorns, or that is, unique experiences, are ultimately inspired and generated by our minds. Mind is their point of conception and birth.

[Tomorrow we’ll consult your GPS and find the best route to go straight to your mind.]


25 replies »

  1. You aren’t a fool for believing life goes on. See, I don’t call you names all the time. 🙂

    I like the name Unikonics. Hopefully you don’t have a problem consulting my GPS. It goes off course a lot!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. What if you found a unicorn with 2 corns, I mean horns? Would a duocorn be double unique? Or is it better to have one unique horn?

    And as you have not seen me in person, you can’t be certain that I am not a blogger from beyond. Though, I am pretty sure that I am just a lousy mortal.

    If we are accepting anecdotal evidence, I know the Church has tons of that with respect to eternal life and all. There are lots of canonized saints and one of the requirements is evidence of intercession from beyond the grave and all. But, if you want to keep it non-religiously religious, I don’t know.

    Liked by 2 people

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