A middle-aged couple dipped into their savings and splurged on a vacation to Hawaii. They felt very excited to visit these islands of the Pacific, in our country’s most exotic state.
But on their first day in Honolulu they got into a debate over how to properly pronounce the name of the state. She believed it should be pronounced Ha-wye-ee, while he contended that it should be pronounced Ha-vye-ee.
They were strolling on Waikiki beach when they spotted a man who looked like he might be a native. It occurred to the husband that this was the perfect opportunity to end their debate. So he stopped the man with, “Excuse me sir, do you live in this state?”
He said, “Yes, I sure do.”
The husband said, “How nice for you that you live in such a beautiful paradise! Now sir, would you be willing to help my wife and me with the way to properly pronounce the name of your state? We want to know, is it Ha-wye-ee or Ha-vye-ee?”
He gave them a big aloha smile, betraying that helpful generous attitude possessed by most natives of the Pacific isles. He answered, “Oh that is easy. It is pronounced Ha-vye-ee.”
The husband felt a little smug as he glanced over at his frowning wife. “Thank you, sir,” he said, “that really clears things up for us.”
The man smiled again and replied with a roll of the tongue, “You’re velcome!”
Categories: Travel
Chasing Unicorns 
Pronouncing b’s as v’s makes me sound Russian, but soviet.
Pronunciation mistakes could lead to war!
When Japanese Premier Mori met US President Clinton, Mori greeted the president in English with, “How are you?” But Mori’s pronunciation sounded like, “Who are you?”
President Clinton was confused by the mispronunciation and answered jokingly, “I’m Hillary’s husband.”
Mori didn’t understand the response. He only knew from his English lessons that after you say, “How are you?”, the other person should reply with something like, “I am fine. Thank you, and you?” Then, you can respond with, “Me too.”
So, Mori said to Clinton, “Me too!”
(This really happened… and in front of news reporters!)
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When I have been to Hungary, sometimes they greet you by saying “szia” and when said quickly, to me is sounds like “see you.” So I would meet someone new and then they would say “see you” like an American would when leaving. This confused me at first because many Hungarians speak English and I figured they were speaking English to the big, dumb, mono-lingual American.
Me: “Hello”
Hungarian: “See you.”
Me: “Well OK, goodbye.”
It was very Abbot and Costello.
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But knowing the Clintons, it’s believable. Funny story. I’ll bet there are a lot of awkward and amusing situations that occur during international diplomatic events.
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I remember my Filipino friend once asking if I had any “pennies” in a store checkout. Sounded an awful lot like “penis”, to which I had to respond with the negative.
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Maybe you should have said, “I don’t dick around with small change.”
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I work with a Hungarian that does the same thing. Sometimes he vorks on the firmvare and softvare.
I also work with a Dutch guy who can’t make the ‘th’ sound that we Americans love so much, so “third party vendors” become “turd party vendors” and there is much talk of “turd parties”. I don’t want to have anything to do with a turd party.
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Me either. You might want to tell that Dutch guy that his pronunciation of English is shitty.
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I don’t want to poo-poo his language skills. It might wipe the smile off of his face.
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That would be a pisser.
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Ha! Sabine Hossenfelder is a German theoretical physicist with a really dry sense of humor. She posted this video, “How to speak English like Einstein”. Since my dad spoke fair German (a science requirement in Japan), I recognized it as actually a pretty good lesson on German phonetic differences. That “th” thing comes up. (replace the “[DOT]”):
youtube[DOT]com/watch?v=Hmy-N4AFNDM
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As a tangent, what is a ‘wet’ sense of humor like?
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I don’t actually know. I try never to laugh that hard.
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Such that you wet your pants? I see. That explains it
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Do you have experience with that? 🙂
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No, that’s why I was asking, silly
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LOL! Just checking.
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True, you wouldn’t laugh hard enough to do that for you are just so “serious” all the time, right? 😂
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I don’t have that issue at this point in my life. And I don’t often laugh like a little school girl.
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It can be an issue as one gets older though! But for the record I also don’t have the issue, for I don’t laugh. 🙂
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You don’t laugh? Damn, I guess we’ll just have to try harder.
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Oh dear , “try harder”? That could be scary. Let me clarify that I wasn’t serious! In school I had a nickname. My maiden name was Geigley, which quickly became Giggly instead!
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Hmm, sounds like you’re just like our Vice-President, whom I call, VP Giggles. It’s a relief to know that you’re so easy to entertain. Now I can go take a nap.
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Oh gosh! Yes, go take a nap, doolally!
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Are all Germans as deadpan as her? I have a zinking feeling dey may be.
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It wouldn’t matter to me if my husband pronounces it wrong, as long as he takes me there, all is GOOD! 😊🏝
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Vell, I hope you can wisit those islands wery soon. Perhaps on your next wacation.
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Vell thank you but don’t see it happening anytime soon. Maybe I could set up a GoFundMe account for a Hawaiian vacation! Just think of all the great stories I could write while sitting on the beach with one of those little umbrella drinks in my hand! Would you sponsor me? 🙂
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No, those umbrella drinks are poison, and I like you and want you to live a long time. Sorry, you’ll have to take your wacations in PA.
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Well aren’t you kind! Thank you, but hey, what if I promised to not get any umbrella drinks? Would you sponsor me then?
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If “sponsor” means to give you moral encouragement, sure.
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vay to go. vonderful story. vell done. You’re vife should be proud of you.
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Don’t vorry, she’s a big fan of my vit and visdom.
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and your big fat vallet…
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It once vas fat, until she vasted all my vealth.
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happy vife, happy life…
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ve think so.
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That is a most true quote. One that husband’s should remember! 😉
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I’m just trying to remember what a “vife” is.
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🙂
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