Booger Rings

Photo by Luriko Yamaguchi on

Booger Rings

My stomach is of hardened steel,

My guts can take a punch,

But when I see a booger ring,

I want to lose my lunch.

Some pierce their ears, their tongues, their rears,

Their cocks, their clits and tits,

And I don’t mind, it all looks fine,

It blows my mind to bits.

The way a person wants to look

Is nothing I oppose,

But I can’t stand those booger rings,

That dangle from the nose.

Bedizened cheeks and stretched-out lips,

And shafts through bellybuttons,

Are great for those who want the look

While seeking pain like gluttons.

But those septum-piercing, dangling jewels,

Like sparkling, hardened snot,

Horrify this germaphobe,

And cannot be forgot.

So stretch your ears and split your tongue,

Plant diamonds in your toes.

But leave it clean, no booger ring,

Please keep those from your nose.

Categories: Humor

88 replies »

  1. Well done, Tippy! My nose for poetry must be rubbing off on you. This reminded me of a poem I did about a booger. I’ll have to try and find it for you, since they are among your favorite subjects.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I remember that poem now. When I read it, I felt a combination of disgust, intrigue, and empathy. Along with laughter. Been there, done that, with those stubborn things.


  2. Personally, I’m with you on the nose rings… though in this case the dilated pupils were a little more unsettling. Not big on eyebrows either.
    But I’ll admit to a good friend who has a considerably more conspicuous nose ring, so maybe I’ve just become desensitized.

    Japanese onsens (hot springs facilities) generally don’t allow visible tattoos. Never seen any signs about piercings.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Yes, the dilated pupils do look a bit startling. I’d hate to answer a door knock, and come face-to-face with a look like that.

      Seems like nose rings are becoming more and more popular, so it’s only a matter of time before we all become desensitized.

      That’s a strange rule about visible tattoos. Japan must be very conservative, compared to the U.S.

      Liked by 1 person

      • There must be something like a “Rule 34” for piercings… “If it exists, there is a piercing of it.”

        “Fitting in” is important to the Japanese. That said, much of what goes on in private would probably shock most Americans.
        (replace the “[DOT]”)

        Liked by 2 people

          • Yep! My place in Tokyo was just a little away and across the street from a local “sento” (public bath) that was a gathering place for the area’s yakuza to show off their… artworks, during a soak. Not the best crowd. Saw a lot of missing little fingers too.

            Liked by 1 person

              • Yes… “Yubitsume” (ζŒ‡θ©°γ‚) . I don’t think the Wikipedia translation of “finger shortening” is correct. That second kanji character means something like “stuffing”, “filling” or “packing”. I think it refers to the the finger becoming the contents of the wrapping that you hand to your boss.
                (“[DOT]” thing)
                Doing a search in Japanese, always have to be careful. Came across a video of how it’s done.


  3. Hahaha! You sound old. If I didn’t know the pain of a belly piercing I may have a nose ring. After the belly piercing in my 20’s and the infection that followed because I wasn’t told you shouldn’t go in a hot tub after was enough. But bring on the tattoos! I just had one touched up on Tues. I’m booked for my next one the middle of Feb. πŸ˜‰

    Liked by 1 person

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