I woke up one morning and realized that I inhabit two worlds. I suppose that may be a good way to describe sleep. It’s like traveling to another world. My waking world belongs to the sublunary realm of humans. My sleep belongs to the superlunary world of the gods.
From the hypnagogic gates to the final hypnopompia, I wander through a strange ether. The gods guide me through scintillating scenery, regale me with mellifluous oratories and music, and surprise me with curious gifts, amorous women, and ambrosia.
I gambol with the spirits of lost loved ones, now denizens of kingdoms in Valhalla and the Islands of the Blessed. I rewrite histories and rehearse futures, like Shakespeare directing plays at the Globe. And I haunt familiar-seeming habitats that I’ve never actually habitated. Déjà vu in HD.
Sometimes wrathful gods attack me with minacious beasts or other malevolent beings, then pour lead into my legs. Or they assign me impossible tasks, as if I’m some kind of Sisyphean inmate. I bear these hagridden episodes by theorizing that they are auguries of misfortune that previse me of avoidable danger.
Sometimes I’m cognizant that this is an alternate reality, and fly lucidly through walls and roofs and sky and space, with a ration of conscious control. But usually it’s all harum-scarum, where I inhabit the only world I know of at the time, and the script is entirely written by a bunch of crazy gods. My input is not welcome.
Shall I tell you about my latest dream? No I shall not. My dreams are only profound to me, as yours are only to you. The dreams of others are boring. It’s hard to hear one without yawning and drifting away. Drifting away to that other world.
That fantastic world of sleep.
Zzzzzzzz . . .
Categories: Miscellaneous
Chasing Unicorns 
Living the dream, eh?
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As often as I can.
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I would like to live the dream in Hawaii but …. ! I will let you know when I find a tropical island in Pa. You may be waiting awhile! LOL!
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So where was this video when I was awake at 4am this morning and couldn’t sleep?
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Rough night, huh? Well now you have the video for all your future sleepless nights.
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It wasn’t bad. I slept deeply until 4am and then I did manage to go back to sleep, even without the video, but now I will keep it in mind for future use.:)
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I can also provide you with a list of puns, that are guaranteed to put you to sleep.
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Ummm…I have no doubt of that. Have you forgotten already the puns I saw right before …smacking…I mean laying my head down on my pillow last night?
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No I haven’t. Jason was on a tear. Apparently, he knows his social media.
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Oh you helped too but yes he was on a roll! But he did forget one social media thing, which popped in my mind last night.
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Yes . . . and . . . ?
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You really think I am going to give either of you the answer, only to be hit with more puns!
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Dang, you’re no pun.
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“Haha!” I should go back and re-read to make sure I didn’t miss it for I can’t believe he missed it. 🙂
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I double checked. My poor brain! Yup you both missed it and he could have easily fit it in the one line that he had!
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I’ve got to know. How much would it cost, to tell me?
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Sorry! The satisfaction of catching a pun that you guys missed is worth more than you sending me gold coin emojis or money bag emojis!
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Pfffft!
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😂
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Here-here! Atta girl…
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🙂
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Hm. I didn’t make it to bed until 5am.
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I do love the flying dreams the best! When I am stressed out, I dream I am a waiter with too many tables. LOL.
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Job dreams can be the worst. I’ve been a retired mailman for over five years, and I still sometimes have dreams of piles of mail, or losing mail, and other nightmarish job scenarios.
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I suddenly remember the multi-armed critter in the cabinet of the Post Office for Agent K in MIB II.
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I don’t think I saw that movie. But yeah, sometimes having more than two arms would have been handy, with all the mail I’d have to deal with.
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Actually, the whole place was full of aliens. I hadn’t seen it in a while:
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Okay, I must confess. I have seen that movie. In fact, I acted in it. I am from a very distant galaxy, stationed on planet Earth disguised as a retired postal worker. You are instructed to destroy any and all copies of this movie that you might have at home. It was not meant to be released to the general public.
You will not remember this comment.
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I just knew were an alien! 🤣🤣🤣
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Shh. Don’t let it get around the galaxy.
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Mums the word…🤐
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Damn.
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Wow! Ferhoodled by a three-for-one this morning… “sublunary.” “hypnopompia,” and “minacious.”
And a 10-hour video… two full nights for me!
Guess I’d better keep this short.
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I was thinking how you would have new words to add to your vocabulary once again! Going to need to start to have a dictionary handy when I read his posts. 🙂
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If I add any more to my vocabulary, there won’t be any room for my teeth.
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LOL! That could be a problem!
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😁
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I hope those words don’t spawn any nightmares. And hopefully the 10 hour video will have you asleep in 10 minutes. If you have to watch the whole thing, you might want a sleeping pill instead.
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Wine works for me. Costco has a good Malbec, and it’s cheaper than a prescription.
A Flesch–Kincaid on paragraph four came out “9.96.” Field Manuals (“FMs”) are usually kept at a “6”. Field Service Manuals (FSMs), somewhat easier. Granted that the average reading skills of American soldiers is higher than Americans in general, you might want to include some notes or illustrations (hopefully not nightmare inducing) for us technical writer types.
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Speaking of readability, I had to look up “Flesch-Kincaid” to understand what you were talking about. I then found a readability calculator online, at:
https://www.wordcalc.com/readability/
It gives paragraph four a Flesch-Kincaid Reading Ease score of 52.1 (100 is the easiest and 0 is the most complicated). And it gave a Flesch-Kincaid Grade level of 9.2.
So I guess I write no more intellectually than a ninth-grader.
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Flesch-Kincaid is just a common one. I’ve done a great deal of technical writing. There are some better systems for analyzing that kind of work. Imagine trying to explain to a front-line technician how to quickly and effectively service a nuclear-armed cruise-missile… tends to read like a phone book sized “choose you own adventure” for a fifth-grader.
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Technical writing, eh? That’s the kind of writing I’ve both cursed and loved, depending on the quality of the work. I very much appreciate an instruction manual that I can easily decipher, when I buy a new product.
But I imagine your kind of work can be very challenging. Especially when you’re trying to tell someone how to service a nuclear missile. You don’t want to make any critical errors.
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“#148: Touch the red wire to the green wire.
If you are still reading this, go to #336.”
I’m trying to imagine the instructions included with the discount Chinese version.
My very last job before officially retiring myself involved how not to kill yourself while maintaining the power-supply to an autonomous inspection robot. I actually traveled to Busan to make sure that there weren’t any possible misunderstandings among the Korean technicians who would be using it.
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Wow! Its good that I didn’t have your job! I am afraid I would be responsible for a lot of deaths!
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Heh-heh, that would be an alarming thing to read, in a technical manual.
Effective communication seems to be the most difficult thing in the world. And when life and death are on the line, I can understand your concern.
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Effective communication on a claymore: “Point Towards Enemy”
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Yes. Paint a bright arrow on it.
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LOL! “#142: Never touch the green wire to the yellow wire.”
Chinese translation: “Yerrow wire no touch gween won.”
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Pffft. That new product’s instructions were written in Chinese then translated into Engrish.
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Yeah, that seems to be the case, a lot. Sometimes I get the sense that I’m learning Chinese syntax and grammar, whenever I read a product manual.
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I think the translations to Engrish are often done by Uncle Google.
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I wouldn’t be surprised.
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Most likely.
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Ed Zachary
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So you know me and my curious brain I had to click on your link just for the fun of it. I put in yesterday’s post. I got a reading ease score of 89.1 but you beat me on the grade level. LOL! I was 3rd grade!
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Maybe that’s because the easier it is to read, the lower the grade level that can read it.
If you want to aim for a higher grade level, maybe you could throw some of your confusing stuff in. For instance, use words like, “emerald blue sky.” And mix up the names now and then.
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“Haha!” on the “emerald blue” sky!
Mix up names? Oooh that may be hard, being that I “never” do that! LOL!
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Right. I think if you use your customary style, you’ll be writing at the university level.
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LOL! Thats a compliment, right?
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Yes. It sure is. Mm-hm.
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I thought so! 🙂
….mmm…!!
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Sounds like the kind of “compliment” my son gave me this weekend. You would laugh!
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What did your erudite son say?
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My “erudite” son? LOL! I sent you an email.
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He did graduate recently, you know. Got it, and replied.
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Yes he did and he does have alot of knowledge…. but…..! 🙂
I replied back.
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Ok, now. There is such a term as “Emerald Blue”:
https://www.americanmeadows.com/perennials/phlox/creeping-phlox-emerald-blue
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Geez, I didn’t know Carolyn worked at a nursery.
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HA! I don’t but apparently I did know what I was talking about! 😜
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Uh-huh. You and that lone, confused person who works at that nursery.
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“Funnny!”
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Then, I’m still operating in first grade. OY.
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The nightmare would be trying to find the damn dictionary and the glasses to read it.
I’m liking this music. Listening as I type…
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Just use an online dictionary, such as Wiktionary.
That’s a fun youtube video, but 10 hours is a long watch. I think it repeats a lot of scenes, and loops the music, throughout.
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I just exhausted myself taking in all those fancy-schmancy words of his.
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Uh oh. Somebody fell asleep reading the thesaurus, methinks! 😁
Deb
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Yes, it had slobber, drool, and saliva all over it.
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You disgusting creature…
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Did you see Cleeta, Scump, of Forchetti?
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No, damnit. I think they’ve forgotten all about me.
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A damn shame
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And I thought they were my friends.
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Speaking of the above video, did you see the SpaceX launch this evening?
My dreams are so vivid and in color, sometimes I’m damn pissed when I wake up.
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No, I didn’t. I bet it was beautiful.
Waking up can really be a bummer. It’s like watching a movie, and the film breaks right in the middle of the best part.
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It was fascinating. Their spacesuits are all different, now. They showed a diagram of how the little ship has to chase down the ISS and dock with it around 24 hours. They had a camera on the side of the rocket. They did story lines on the astronauts. It was cool. First rocket that NASA had no control over.
I KNOW!
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Gotta give Musk credit, he seems to be doing a good job, advancing space exploration.
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I suppose. He’s also cluttering up the skies with satellites, to the extreme dismay of astronomers and can’t seem to build a self-driving car that doesn’t run into shit or blow up.
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And he accused a cave rescuer in Thailand of child molestation, just because he didn’t like Musk’s cave rescue idea.
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He’s a charmer!
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I will give him credit for one more thing. Did you hear about his COVID test? He was tested 4 times. Two positive tests, two negative tests. He tweeted about it. Same machine, same test, same nurse. “Something extremely bogus is going in.”
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That’s right. He raised an interesting red flag there.
I’ve heard of people who’ve filled out the paperwork to take the test, got in a long line, then decided they didn’t want to wait so long in line and went home without being tested. Then, a few days later, they’ve received notices that they tested positive. Go figure.
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We seem to be swimming in massive fraud on several fronts.
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Or drowning.
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Yeah. Ed Zachary.
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Amorous women are my favorites!
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Yes, those are nice gifts from the dream gods.
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They are just so sad to wake up from.
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And frustrating.
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Yes, very.
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