Humor

Talker Meditation

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Don’t let incessant talkers scare you away.

There are some people I know, who I haven’t spoken to in years. That’s because I don’t like to interrupt. These people have motor mouths that go on and on like flibbertigibbets. They can be a real pain in the ass, and the ear, to be around. But there is one thing good about them. They’ve inspired me to invent a new form of meditation.

Meditation came up as a subject a few weeks ago, at Borden’s Blather. I told Jim Borden that there are many different ways to meditate. But I forgot to tell him about Talker Meditation. Since Jim’s blog is about blather, I think he’d appreciate knowing about Talker Meditation. So this post is for him, and for you too, if you’re interested.

I’ve noticed that those who talk for a long time, cease to make sense after a short time. Their nonstop blather is due to a disease they have, called logorrhea. And those with logorrhea constantly fire off fusillades of words that disrupt our thought processes, blocking our ability to think.

But that’s good, because meditation is about letting go of your thoughts. So the logorrhea-afflicted are useful as meditation props. They help us to let go of our thoughts.

The next time you find yourself in the company of someone who yabbers and maunders incessantly, try this little experiment. Try very loosely to follow what they’re saying. Don’t try too hard to make sense of it, or you’ll go mad. Just follow along loosely. If you’re experience is like mine, you may soon find yourself automatically letting go of your thoughts, while being carried away by a stream of meaningless words.

If the blatherskite asks for feedback, just nod your head hypnotically and chant, “Mmhmm.” Soon they’ll be off again in nonstop soliloquy, and you can drift away into serene samadhi.

This is how you can transfigure the Hell of a talker into a peaceful Heaven. But I’ve said enough. I won’t explain Talker Meditation any further. No, I will not be your meditation prop.

I have my own talkers, and you must find yours.

Categories: Humor

252 replies »

  3. Good advice! My late husband was a talker (oh boy, was he ever!) and I zoned out a lot when he got on a rant (of which nothing was anything I hadn’t heard already from him). I never thought of it as meditative, even though that was exactly what it was, out of necessity!

    Deb

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  4. I used to talk a lot just before we went to sleep at night. Unbenounced to me Hubby would fall asleep and be answering me in his sleep.

    As far as the meditation thing, I’ll have to try that with my Mother-in-law. Lol

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  5. I worry about the sub-conscious affects of such a practice. All that gibberish could make it into your brain without your realizing and you could experience random thoughts of utter nonsense to upset your day.

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  6. gee whiz! stawpit evrybuddy & lissen 2 me! (jes’ kiddingling …) axually, yeah, seams we awl know a person or 3 like this. (i’ve been ackyoozd of such, but (i’d hope) not too frequently!

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  7. my students must be masters of talker mediation by now…

    I always thought when they nodded their heads hypnotically and chanted, “Mmhmm.” that they were just agreeing with what I just said…

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  8. Great blog! I will try the Talker Meditation method next time I am with my friends! I’m afraid I am too much of a coward to try this out on my wife who commands total silence and committment on my behalf!

    Liked by 1 person

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