I’ve been gathering coronavirus news, and now I’m taking this stifling mask off and spreading it around:
Mount Baldy, California: The Mount Baldy Mountain Resort got hit with a shitload of snow in April, but alas it was in the midst of the coronavirus lockdown. But they said, “Fuck this shit, we’re opening anyway.” Golf courses have been allowed to reopen, so in late April they took a cue from the golf courses, implemented social distancing measures, and opened up to skiers. They did not wait for permission from the government. Hell, by the time they might get that, all the snow would be melted away. So far the government seems to be leaving them alone.
My source: https://abc7.com/weather/mount-baldy-opens-despite-being-deemed-non-essential-business/6125570/
Boing: The Boeing Company is bouncing back by implementing safety measures and returning thousands of its employees to work. Isn’t it nice to know they can resume building airplanes nobody wants to fly in?
My source: https://www.cbsnews.com/video/boeing-implements-safety-measures-to-get-employees-back-to-work/
Orange County, California: Beaches in Orange County, California opened up the last weekend of April. But Governor Gavin Newsom was unhappy about this, and deployed his iron fist to close them down the next weekend. But after intense pressure, and being called a party pooper, he’s now allowing them to reopen. However, anyone using the beach must stay physically active. Laying about on the sand will not be allowed. You must constantly stay on the move, whether by walking, swimming, surfing, doing cartwheels, practicing yoga, juggling beach balls, or otherwise looking like you’re doing something. I wonder if standing still is allowed as long as you’re picking your nose?
My source: https://news.yahoo.com/california-allows-more-orange-county-192436329.html
New York City: A slew of calls poured into New York City’s Poison Control Center, from people who drank Lysol, bleach, and other household cleaners, the day after President Trump suggested injecting disinfectant to fight Covid-19. The Center says they received twice the amount of calls they normally receive for such poisonings. But the good news is that none of the callers died, either from poisoning or from Covid-19.
Bakersfield, California: Two doctors held a news conference that went viral on YouTube, claiming that the death rate of Covid-19 isn’t nearly as high as officials are leading the public to believe. They called for stay-at-home orders to end. They also criticized Dr. Fauci of the CDC, stating, “We’re actually seeing the patients. Dr. Fauci hasn’t seen a patient in 20 years.” YouTube has removed the video of the press conference, explaining that YouTube prohibits content that explicitly disputes the efficacy of local health authority recommended guidance on social distancing. I understand that this censorship of opposing viewpoints to CDC guidelines also occurs on Facebook and Twitter. Whew! It’s a good thing that YouTube, Facebook, and Twitter have recognized just how stupid we are, and are here to help us make the right decisions about how to deal with this virus.
My source: https://abc7.com/health/doctors-use-disputed-data-to-suggest-stay-home-orders-be-lifted/6138585/
Albany, New York: Governor Cuomo has expressed shock that 84% of new coronavirus hospitalizations are people who are mostly staying home, and not going outside much. Does this mean the CDC has completely fucked up, and given us the opposite recommendation of what we must do to stay alive? And what happens next? Will the CDC change it’s policy and recommend we get the hell out of our homes? Will our governors issue “stay-away-from-home” orders, and force us to be locked out, rather than locked down? They reversed their policy on wearing masks, so who knows what’s coming next from the CDC.
Los Alamos, New Mexico: Researchers at the Los Alamos National Laboratory have reported on May 5, that the coronavirus has mutated into a new, more contagious strain that is spreading across the U.S. This is very depressing, fucked up news. We’re DOOMED!
Reactions of Experts to the Experts at Los Alamos: Dr. Scott Gottlieb, of CNBC reacted to the news of May 5, about the new, more contagious strain of coronavirus, by urging caution. He stated that the study by Los Alamos has not been peer-reviewed and “doesn’t prove anything.” He also divulged a well-known fact within scientific circles, that is apparently not well known to the general public. And that is, viruses generally mutate into weaker strains, not stronger. This is all about evolution. Viruses cannot survive long if they kill off their hosts, so they tend to become weaker over time, because they want to keep their hosts alive. Other doctors seem to concur, with one claiming that this is “Virology 101.” Okay, so maybe we’re not doomed. Perhaps it’s best to stop reading the news.
My sources: https://www.cnbc.com/2020/05/06/dr-scott-gottlieb-cautions-on-coronavirus-mutation-study-new-strain.html
https://www.foxnews.com/media/new-study-revealing-covid-19-mutations-weakening
Categories: coronavirus
Chasing Unicorns 
In Skeeterslap Texas, it has been reported that veterinarians are seeing a large influx of cases in which dogs have, um gone horse, having worn out their bark. It is being speculated that this is linked to the increased frequency of Fedex and UPS deliveries timed with their masters’ video conferences for work. A team from the Bureau of Administration of Raucous K9s is sticking its snout into this issue.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Thanks for that news report, Jason. Sounds like Skeeterslap has more on their hands than just skeeters. Those horse dogs might decide to bite BARK, so if I was a bureaucrat, I’d be careful where I poke my snout.
LikeLike
There are trying times in Skeeterslap with the Stay at Trailer Home orders and all. 4 of the 5 junk yards in town have had to layoff staff and dogs. With no hospital and town, the 24 beer joints have been ordered to convert their pool tables into hospital beds. There is oddly enough, no shortage of opioids as of yet.
LikeLiked by 1 person
And I heard that with no beer or pool games, domestic violence is on the rise in Skeeterslap. So far, two husbands have been killed, and the rest are sheltering in place beneath their trailer homes.
LikeLiked by 1 person
That would lead to an increase in racoon attacks as well, I am afraid. Thankfully, the city implemented a thorough rabies vaccination program a couple of years ago after hurricane Harvey flooded peoples’ trailer houses with raccoons, skunks, armadillos, and possums (most of which were then eaten).
LikeLike
That’s nice that the city implemented a rabies vaccination program. So now I guess the raccoons won’t have to worry about catching rabies when the humans try to take a bite out of them.
LikeLiked by 1 person
It takes a lot of barking to wear out a barker, I think. My dog should surely have worn hers out by now, but it’s still going strong. I can’t believe all we have to do to change the law is call someone a “party pooper.” That hasn’t worked with our governor, at least not yet. I’ve noticed many people have taken matters into their own hands, like Mt Baldy-ites, and are just doing whatever the heck they want. Virologists are right, a virus cuts its own legs if it kills off ALL the hosts. What is left to prey on? I’m very glad I don’t live in the Skeeterslap Trailer Village. Dying on a pool table is not how I envision meeting my end. 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Well, I called the gov a party pooper. Everyone else made up their own names.
People have to survive, so law or no law, I think we’ll see more taking matters into their own hands, and joining an ever-growing black market.
I’m glad I don’t live in Skeeterslap, also. When they have to use a pool table for a hospital bed, they can literally find themselves behind the 8-ball.
LikeLiked by 1 person
LOL. People are getting more daring… cutting their own hair, touching gas pump handles with their bare hands, helping themselves to two packages of toilet paper when the sign clearly says “LIMIT: 1.” Chaos and lawlessness are on the horizon for sure. 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
So far we haven’t had any toilet paper riots, but I wouldn’t be surprised if one breaks out in a Walmart somewhere.
LikeLiked by 1 person
blurt
LikeLiked by 1 person
I agree.
LikeLike
Sigh.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yep.
LikeLike
OH gosh!
I think your last line is the best advice, for you are apt to just get more confused with the more you read!
And when I go to the beach I do walk, but I also like to sit! So if I sit but move my feet up and down in the sand, does that count as moving?
LikeLiked by 1 person
You can try. Maybe you can move your head around and around, and tell the cops you’re doing neck exercises.
LikeLike
Hard to reading if moving my head in circles and may make me dizzy if I do that while watching the waves! I think I will stick with just moving my feet. 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Alright. You can also wiggle your toes, for added effect.
LikeLike
They are usually buried in the sand, but yes, that wouldn’t be a problem.
LikeLiked by 1 person